Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Much Ado About MOPS

Today I attended my very first MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) meeting.

And I quite liked it.

Jackson got to go in a room with all the kids and play and I got to interact with other women who have young children. And who live in Norwalk. It was a two-for-one deal for me. I've lived here for 6 1/2 years and I still feel like I don't know anyone. This was just perfect.

They did some introductions and then there was a speaker on children's first aid. It was really interesting and we even got to make first aide kits for our cars. Mine is proudly located in my glove box. Then we broke into groups and answered health-related questions like how we baby-proofed our house and why kids seem to wear their boo-boos as badges of honor. All of the moms were super-nice and I felt at ease talking to them.

The group meets the 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month but I secretly wish it was every week. :)

Friday, January 16, 2009

Baby, it's cold outside

So I am lying in bed this morning with Jackson watching The Weather Channel's Local on the 8's and they say it is -13 with a windchill of -34. I don't remember it ever being that cold out before. Although, I did read somewhere this past Summer that the Farmer's Almanac said this winter was going to be bitterly cold.

Anyway, while watching tv, I started to think about how lucky we are to the greatness that is Local on the 8's. Every eight minutes it tells us what the weather is in my town. Every. Eight. Minutes. I guiltily admit that there have been times that I have kept The Weather Channel on for an hour and just watched all the Local on the 8's that play in that time frame...that's five times. I feel that perhaps I am borderline obsessed with Local on the 8's. I watch it first thing in the morning, I watch it as soon as I get home from work, I watch it again before I lay clothes out for the next day, I watch it right after dinner and I watch it right before bed. Then it starts all over again.

But then, there are the times where The Weather Channel decides they have to play an actual show and then Local on the 8's doesn't come on! Seriously, I need my Local on the 8's fix. Why must they torture me like that? And my poor mother. She lives in the country and has a satellite dish ... her Weather Channel doesn't do a Local on the 8's. It just does an overview of the major metro cities. It doesn't have the catchy guy saying "Currently, it is -13 degrees in your area with partly sunny skies". Or better yet "The Week Ahead!"...the computerized male voice says it with such vigor.

Sigh. I *heart* you, Local on the 8's.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Have you EVER?

I saw this on Shaunda's blog and I thought it looked like fun!

The things I've done are in bold.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars

3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis - got bit by one, too!
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea (from the beach)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch - only if graphic design counts!
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping

27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice --- this is my dream!!!!
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
-- on Wii baseball :)
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance

47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater

55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial

71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone - my toe
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible required to be an Honor Star
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club9
3. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby

95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. DONE any thing this silly before?

Friday, January 9, 2009

This is why I love JC Penney

I was reading a current blog posting at one of my favorite blogs -- www.jenontheedge.com (you must follow this blog; it is sheer genius) -- and it reminded me of an email I received about JC Penney catalog ads from years ago. And since we could all use a good laugh on a Friday, I thought I would share. Too bad these styles aren't still available. :) The commentary added by whoever came up with this original email just adds to it. Enjoy!

Last weekend I put an exhaust fan in the ceiling for my wife's grandfather. While my wife's brother and I were fitting the fan in between the joists, we found something under the insulation. What we found was this:

A JC Penney catalog from 1977. It's not often blog fodder just falls in my lap, but holy hell this was two solid inches of it, right there for the taking. I thumbed through it quickly and found my next dining room set, which is apparently made by adding upholstery to old barrels:

Also, I am totally getting this for my bathroom:

There's plenty more home furnishings where those came from, however I'm not going to bore you with that. Instead, I'm going to bore you with something else. The clothes.

The clothes are fantastic .

Here's how to get your ass kicked in elementary school:

Just look at that belt. It's like a boob-job for your pants. He probably needed help just to lift it into place. The belt loops have to be three inches long. And way to pull them up to your armpits, grandpa.

Here's how to get your ass kicked in high school:

This kid looks like he's pretending to be David Soul, who is pretending to be a cop who is pretending to be a pimp that everyone knows is really an undercover cop. Who is pretending to be 15.

Here's how to get your ass kicked on the golf course:

This "all purpose jumpsuit" is, according to the description, equally appropriate for playing golf or simply relaxing around the house. Personally, I can't see wearing this unless you happen to be relaxing around your cell in D-block . Even then, the only reason you should put this thing on is because the warden made you, and as a one-piece, it's slightly more effective as a deterrent against ass-rapery.

Here's how to get your ass kicked pretty much anywhere:

If you look at that picture quickly, it looks like Mr. Bob "No-pants" Saget has his hand in the other guy's pocket. In this case, he doesn't, although you can tell just by looking at them that it's happened - or if it hasn't happened it will. Oh yes. It will. As soon as he puts down his matching coffee cup.

Here's how to get your ass kicked at the beach:

He looks like he's reaching for a gun, but you know it's probably just a bottle of suntan lotion in a holster.

How to get your ass kicked in a meeting:

If you wear this suit and don't sell used cars for a living, I believe you can be fined and face serious repercussions, up to and including termination. Or imprisonment, in which case you'd be forced to wear that orange jumpsuit.

How to get your ass kicked on every day up to and including St. Patrick's Day

Dear god in heaven, I don't believe that color exists in nature. There is NO excuse for wearing either of these ensembles unless you're working as a body guard for the Lucky Charms leprechaun.

In this next one, Your Search For VALUE Ends at Penneys.

As does your search for chest hair.

And this -- Seriously. No words.

Oh wait, it turns out that there are words after all. Those words are What. The. F***. I'm guessing the snap front gives you quick access to the chest hair. The little tie must be the pull tab.

Also, judging by the sheer amount of matching his/hers outfits, I'm guessing that in 1977 it was considered pretty stylish for couples to dress alike. These couples look happy, don't they?

I am especially fond of this one, which I have entitled "Cowboy Chachi Loves You Best."

And nothing showcases your everlasting love more than the commitment of matching bathing suits. That, and a blonde girl with a look on her face that says "I love the way your junk fights against that fabric."

Then, after the lovin', you can relax in your one-piece matching terry cloth jumpsuits:

I could go on, but I'm tired, and my eyes hurt from this trip back in time. I think it's the colors. That said, I will leave you with these tasteful little numbers:

Man, that's sexy.